August 15, 2008 11:24 AM

Wonderwoman would totally be a lesbian

I found another really cool article on The Topless Robot. It's "10 Reasons No One Cares About Wonder Woman." I'll give you the rundown of the list but make sure to check out the article yourself. It has really good examples of each case.
10. Her costume sucks (Scary blue patriotic granny panties ftl!)

9. No good storylines

8. Most comics are terrible (from what I've seen I agree)

7. Golden Age Wonder Woman was really lame

6. "Her Lasso of Bondage" (omg it's so true, I mean seriously that lasso reminds me of how much of a hoe Stacy X (Apparently known as Ripcord now) is in X-men. Also has anyone ever noticed that Wonderwoman's boots are so just red hooker boots? Somtimes really tacky hooker boots but still.)
She's gonna get ya!

5. The Invisible plane sucked (How dumb of an idea was the invisible plane I mean really!)

4. Terrible normal villains and almost no super-villains

3. Steve Trevor isn't hot are desirable in any way (why is he in that comic, clearly she's a lesbian people! I mean come on Amazon princess.)

2. No sidekicks or cool butler friends to speak of

1. She's just a girl version of Superman (and Superman really sucks, seriously Batman could totally kick his ass any day of the week. It's why he never joined the Justice League. ;) )

I'd like to add one to the list actually. She has no real secret identity. One of the main good things about superheroes is that they have to hide their secret lives from their loved ones so that

A. They don't think they're a freak and leave them ;) and
B. So no super-villian decides to kidnap them and hold them for randsom or kill them.

Plus isn't the whole part of a super heroes secret identity supposed to make them relateable and nobody wants to relate to a blue granny panty wearing Amazon that wears hooker boots! Does she ever wear normal clothes?

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